Want some cheese with that "whine"?

Well...I don't allow myself to indulge in this kind of stuff too often, but yesterday (and a little bit of today), I did. Let me warn you up front, if you don't want to hear whining, go ahead and close this blog for today and tune in tomorrow, when I'm positive everything will be back to normal. I am a firm believer that God made each of us to be unique and with a distinct purpose in this world. I very rarely compare what I feel like my calling and purpose is with what I see someone else doing. That procedure, in my mind, does nothing good for anyone. I don't know what God has asked you to do or where you are in your journey, so it would be like comparing apples to oranges. However, I do have a dream in my heart of what I feel like eventually I want to be doing with my business - occasionally I wonder when it's going to happen, if I'm doing something to slow up the process, if I'm being true to myself and my calling, etc., etc. And I try to be honest about myself and my flaws (believe me, I know I have them). But this week I learned of a person who I've known for years who is basically fulfilling my dream and I have to admit, I looked in the mirror and I saw pure unadulterated jealousy and anger looking back at me. (It was kinda ugly, I have to say!). Here I am (this is what I told myself - notice how I'm apparently not going to help myself out here by being positive!), busting my buns, doing everything I know to do, trying to be as helpful and as positive as possible, going the extra mile, yada, yada, yada - just indulging in a HUGE pity party! Why is it working for her and not for me, I whined. I have no answers and, believe me, I've said all the "patronizing" responses to myself already to no avail. So just for today (and part of yesterday), I'm allowing myself to wallow in some whining and feeling sorry for myself. See - I feel better already just getting it off my chest - thanks!