It's Complicated!

Went to see that movie last weekend - It's Complicated. Wasn't sure I'd like it, and there were questionable parts, of course, but oh my goodness - how good it feels to laugh until you have tears in your eyes. The Bible says a merry heart does good like a medicine - I believe it! When I came out of that theatre, I just seemed, lighter, happier - I don't know. It sounds kinda corny, but laughing is just plain good for you - body, soul, and spirit. Put yourself in a position today to get in some laughing time - do what you have to do - (if you can't find a way to laugh, call me and I'll tell you one of my ridiculous happenings!) - you'll feel better and people will wonder what's up with you, depending on where you experience your "laughing time!"

How do I see things?

Once again, as I ponder the current happenings in my life, the word perception pops to the forefront. If you put 10 people in a room and showed them a picture or a short video clip, then asked questions, you'd get completely different answers from each one. Did you ever see that movie "Man of the House". It was about some cheerleaders (5 or 6 I think) who witnessed a man being shot. When asked about the shooter, they said things like, "he was tall", "he was short", "he was blonde", "he was bald". Now they all saw the same man, so how could that be? An unconscious thing happens as we process what we see - it's "filtered", if you will, through our own experiences and knowledge, thus it's always truth to us, but very rarely is it the complete and accurate truth. The problem comes in, I think, (as if this discrepancy weren't enough), that 99.9% of us tend to forget this fact, and we believe that what we see and think and perceive is the honest to goodness truth and so, by a process of elimination, the other person must be wrong. Hmmm. This causes some confusion, some chaos, and often some hurt feelings. I have a friend with whom I experience this alot. This particular friend tends to think they know what I'm going to say, and I think, since I love details and talk lots, this person's mind tends to wander. Then later, when something doesn't fall into place correctly, this friend will say, "but you said", and I always have to say, "that's not what I said - that might be what you heard, but it wasn't what I said". It occurs to me that only God knows the actual 100% correct truth. My only hope of knowing that truth in each situation comes by letting Him shine His spotlight and show me. So that's my prayer...show me the truth; I also try really hard to remember this whole scenario of process and make room for it in my life - you know, kind of the old adage, putting myself in someone else's shoes and checking out the view from there.

Never say never

You know how you say (or at least I've been known to say) "I'll never do such and such" or "I'm never going to do that again", then low and behold, within about 6 months (or longer) you find yourself doing exactly the thing you swore you'd never do? How does that happen? Do I just not know myself or is it that the very thing I concentrate on and say I won't do, comes back to haunt me so to speak? Do I bring it on myself by my insistence and concentration of energy and thoughts on that idea? Who knows? But it seems to be true more than not, and actually, kind of comical when I see it happen to someone else! I have quite a list of things I said (if even only to myself), "that's something I'll never do", yet here I am. I guess maybe now that it's happened to me so much, I should pay attention to what I say I'll "never ever" do, then get prepared, because I'm probably going to soon find myself in the middle of doing exactly that!

Relationships

Could they be any harder? More painful? Yet more joyful and satisfying? For some reason God made each of us to be in relationship with one another and it seems to be the most difficult, yet wonderful thing. Odd, isn't it? Each of us thinks differently, views things differently, and for each of us, our opinion is the right one. So when someone we're in relationship with does something we consider "wrong" or "undesirable", we're offended. How do we work through that? Is that relationship worth saving, so we overlook some things? Or is it so heinous that we have to cut that person out of our lives? Or are we ever "supposed" to cut someone out of our lives? Where is the line where we set a boundary and be true to our own self, yet still realize as we mature, that it's not always about us and what we want and how we feel. Confusing, isn't it? As I get older (and hopefully more mature), I think about these things alot because things change as you age. People move away, get married, have families of their own, switch jobs, even pass away, so your circle of acquaintances changes. That's part of life, I know, but still at times it seems weird. There must be something very important about being in relationship with others, as God has literally mandated that by the very nature of our existence here. Hmmm. Guess I'd better pay good attention to the relationships I have - how important they are to me, which ones empower and support my life, which ones are a negative drain (energy vampires we used to call them in massage school), and which ones are just simply a joy to engage in. Make sure you have some good relationships in your life - cultivate them, work at them - don't feel badly if certain ones don't become or remain as close as you thought - let each walk their own path, but don't walk it alone.

The Blind Side

Today after church and lunch, my friend and I finally went to see The Blind Side - what a touching story. I know, it was a movie, and I'm sure there were some embellishments for Hollywood, but underneath it all, what a cool movie depicting a wonderful gesture and commitment to helping our fellow man. Aside from the fact that Sandra Bullock (one of my personal faves anyway) was absolutely amazing in this movie, the bottom line here is one of reminding us of something that, I personally believe, is one of the things God expects of us on this earth - here is a family that went out of their own comfort zone to help another human being. And, as a side note, I saw part of a tv interview with Michael Oher who now actually plays football for the Baltimore Ravens, and he was so sweet and humble - I was really impressed with his demeanor. Anyway, on the way home we were talking and were saying how in all actuality, if each Christian did one thing - if each Christian family took in one person who needed help, if each person looked around and met one need for someone less fortunate than themselves, what a better place this would be, and how much more of God's love would be spread around. See anyone around you less fortunate or who needs a little help? Maybe there's something you can do to meet their need. Think about it. We can all do something - maybe not as encompassing as taking another person into our home forever, but something. And who knows how that one little something might change another person's life.

Another Drumming Night!

Last night was our monthly drumming circle - it's always so much fun, but this time was especially interesting because we had a new instrument. In the pictures above, you'll see Tracey with the new "ocean drum". It looks like a regular hand drum, but is filled with metal beads that are supposed to sound like relaxing ocean waves when you move the drum around. It actually sounds more like a typhoon size wave if you ask me - a little on the loud side, but still very interesting. You can shake it, roll it, or just beat it with a mallet like a regular drum that results in a snare drum type sound. All in all, it was great fun. There's something therapeutic about beating on something, I guess - takes all your frustrations out. How comforting to be able to get that release amongst friends. Our group is growing and that makes it fun, also, to get to meet other people and share together. Hmmm..sounds a little like community forming, eh?

Disappointed

This is my niece, Maria, on Christmas Eve. There she is all decked out in her paper crown that came out of our Christmas crackers. Her expression is just how I feel today. You know how you try and try and try and try to make something work out the way you want it to, and in the end (whenever that eventually comes) it just ain't gonna work out that way? Well, that's where I am today....grieving a little, disappointed alot, wondering what's going to be around the corner. I know I think it would be better for me if things happened the way I want them to (there's that ugly control problem again!), but, perhaps down the road I will see that this will be for the best. So I'm going off to practice that look - I know I won't be as cute as she is when I do it, but at least on the inside, I'm going to let myself have today just to scowl - tomorrow I'll be looking at a bright new day, and we'll see what's on the horizon.

Brittany's Birthday!

Yesterday was Brittany's (my daughter-in-law) birthday. Today we celebrated with her requested meal: ribs with homemade barbecue sauce, cheesey po's (cheesey potatoes), baked beans, crescent rolls, etc. We played apples to apples and laughed and ate - a usual Moldenhauer get together. It's always fun. Happy Birthday, Britt, and thanks, kids, for making another fun memory with me.

Snow Day??

Well, in anticipation of the impending "blizzard" we have switched houses. Barry's staying here in Pekin with me and Tanner and Mal went to Peoria to stay with Britt. That way, hopefully everyone can get to their respective jobs tomorrow when the big snow hits. This is a picture of Mal and Britt sharing one of the snuggies they got for Christmas. They may have to use one tonight - except Drake and Cooper (Barry and Britt's dogs) may want to get warm, too. Everyone be careful if you have to get out tomorrow. If we really do get all that snow, it will be a winter wonderland.

Ticket

When I moved into my new house in Pekin this past spring, I noticed alot of the cars were parked on the street facing the opposite direction. When you come to my house, you enter the subdivision, then go to the last street and turn left, then my house is on the left. So it's easier to come that way, and consequently just park facing that way in front of the house. I thought about it briefly when we moved in, but not really very long because I park in the garage (one of the benefits of being the old one!). At first when we had the garage full of boxes and I had to park on the street, I would turn a block early, go all the way down the block, then turn and come all the way up my block - about a 3 minute venture, in all honesty. But soon, I just travelled all the way down to my street and parked the wrong way. That's the point - it's still the wrong way. Anyway, we've lived there 8 months now and literally, every single car on our side of the street parks that way. So the other night, Tanner got a parking ticket - along with every other car on our side of the street. A policeman had apparently gone by and ticketed every single car. What's my point? Two fold actually. First, even if no one sees you, wrong is wrong; and secondly, beware - it's so stinking easy to fall into doing something not quite right, just because everyone around you is doing it and getting away with it. Oh yah, and I noticed this a.m. when I came to work - everyone was parked pointing in the correct direction on our side of the street. Hmmm.

Changing world

I grew up in Tremont - lived 9/10 of my life there - we affectionately call it "Tinyville". Only there can you leave your atm card in the bank atm and someone else brings it home to you. Only there can you accidentally mail your bank deposit instead of your bills and go in and have them dig it out for you! It reminds me of that movie Have you heard about the Morgans, when a townsperson tells them everyone leaves their keys in their car in case someone needs to borrow it. But I digress. Maybe that's why I've been accused of being "naive" or maybe it's just my personality, but I am continually surprised these days at people and their attitudes. The other day I had to go to the "Communist store" (Walmart) - ok, I didn't HAVE to, but it was late at night after I got off work and it was the most convenient for me - that's how they're taking over the world. Anyway, I had some soda and a case of water for work on the bottom of my cart. The cashier said I didn't have to take them out, she'd come around with her wand thingy and scan them. While I was putting my bags in the cart, she gave me a total and I realized she never scanned my drinks, so I told her. She was sooooo appreciative and went on and on and on about how she couldn't believe someone would actually be honest when it hurt them financially. I said, are you kidding me? I planned to purchase these items, not steal them. She laughed, but said really, you'd be surprised at how many people wouldn't have said anything - have we really become that dishonest, just to save a few bucks? Then yesterday I had lunch with an old friend and as I pulled in the restaurant parking lot, I saw a nice glove laying on the ground. So I took it in with me and gave it to the hostess, saying I thought someone might come back looking for it. She was obviously aggravated with me. What did I want her to do about it, she asked. Well, I said I just thought someone might come back and ask if someone turned it in, then she would have it. She rolled her eyes at me - SHE ROLLED HER EYES AT ME - (I couldn't believe that part!) and threw the glove under the reception desk. Wow. Have we really become that uncaring about someone else and their needs? Sad to me. It just made me that much more determined to adhere to my Christian values - in this day and age, my friends, we should stick out more and more by our exemplary behavior - and it doesn't appear that, in this changing world, it will even be that difficult.

First Day of the New Year

Well..hmmm..not too much exciting to report. I began the lovely chore of taking down the Christmas decorations. It seems like putting them up is so much fun, and taking them down is, well, a chore. I leave a few "winter" decorations out, but most of the pretties get put away. We are doing some re-arranging at our house, so this weekend (except tomorrow - work) will be filled with that kind of stuff - re-arranging, packing up, etc. Of course, I made the Moldenhauer traditional ham and beans for new year's day, but forgot to buy cornbread mix, so we missed out on that this year, since it was literally too cold for any humans (mainly me) to be out! Someone sent me a video clip about 2010 and how it was going to be the year of, among other things, "demystification". Hmm. I thought about that awhile and decided that one of the things I enjoy about life is the fact that it mystifies me most of the time. I often don't see things coming, if you will, and that kind of makes life a little more fun for me - it makes the ride a little more spontaneous and surprising. I'm sure this piece on 2010 wasn't exactly talking about mystification in that regard, but that's what it made me think of. The whole piece was actually about creating a positive life for ourselves by following our dreams and generating positive energy as opposed to always being negative. Good thought. So for this upcoming year, let's expect positive and encouraging things - and hang on - who knows what kind of a ride we might be in for!