Connections

Yesterday I was told about a gentleman who graduated high school a couple years before me - that would make him approximately only 52 years old. He took his own life this past week. While he didn't live around here anymore, and I hadn't seen or heard of him for all these many years, the news still had quite an impact on me - unexpected, almost, the depth of the reaction. I experienced the same sort of feelings last year when a lady from our church, one whom I didn't even know except to recognize where she and her husband usually sat in the sanctuary, also took her own life. The thoughts in both scenarios came immediately to my mind...who was he/she close to? Couldn't someone have recognized or suspected that something was wrong - that they needed some guidance or intervention or whatever it was they needed? Didn't the Holy Spirit try to nudge someone in their lives to call or contact them somehow? And I know, people are reluctant to share those things with others, and everyone's busy and we're not really responsible for others...or are we? The question occurs to me that in this day of instant computerized communication, i.e. e-mail, facebook, twitter, etc., that it may be possible that we have somehow replaced real, true relationship and one on one face to face conversation with this new almost "superficial" method of relating and connecting to others? Now, I'm not bashing facebook or e-mailing or any of those methods of communication - I use them all the time. But what I am suggesting is that I'm afraid for some of us, that's all the interaction we have with others - if we're not on the computer, we're on the phone, texting, messaging. Is that what occurred in these two people's lives? We won't ever know. But it seems to me it would be alot easier to "put on a happy face" when no one is really seeing that face. For all our technological advances, let's not forget the value of true human contact, touch and interaction. You never know who might need it.

Tree day!

The day after Thanksgiving....our family holiday tradition (as often as we can and whoever can) is to go get the Christmas tree for my house. Now, we don't cut our own down, but we do get a real one. We usually take one of the boys' trucks down to Talbott's and pick out a tree. This year Barry had to work and Mal was sleeping from working last night and in preparation for working tonight, so Tanner, Brit and I went. Tanner was on a mission to find our perfect tree as quickly as was humanly possible, so we were only there about 5 minutes total, but we found a perfect tree - not too expensive, not too big for the living room, and relatively straight. We took it home and it now sits in its new home for the next 4 or 5 weeks, letting it's arms relax and waiting for the decorations to land on it this weekend. Then we ate a traditional Thanksgiving dinner (our traditional, at least) which includes turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, sweet potatoes, dressing (stovetop, in our case), our favorite broccoli casserole, madonna salad, crescent rolls, and pies - this year's choice included lemon meringue (Tanner's fave) and apple crumb pie with vanilla ice cream and homemade carmel sauce drizzled over (Brit's fave). Everyone took home leftovers, as we were too full to consume it all! I love having my children all here together for a meal. It is always truly a time to be thankful for.

Activity galore!

Wow - I've been so inundated with things to do, I haven't even had time to write here on my blog - which, by the way, has become a fun thing in my day to do. Even if no one reads my writings, it has kinda given me a little insight into what's stirring on my insides. Anyway, of course, the holidays are what's front and center on everyone's minds right now, and I'm no different. We also have alot of other things happening in our family right now, health wise and job (or shall I say jobless!) wise, so there's lots to be thinking about, organizing, analyzing, and just plain tending to. So even though most of us would say right now that our lives in one way or another are not what we consider ideal; i.e., we need a financial blessing, we need a healing physically (or emotionally), our children have needs - whatever it is - we still, I am confident, have many more things we can be thankful for. Here's a short general list to prod your memory: we live in America, where we can pretty much do and say whatever we want, including where and how and when we choose to worship God; we can see, we can hear, we can touch, we have food to eat, a place to live, friends and family to share with, cars to drive, computers to communicate on, clothes to wear - not only 1 coat for most of us or 1 pair of shoes, (except for me because I still haven't had time to pull everything out of that closet!) but several coats and shoes to pick from - the list goes on and on. We have so much to be thankful for, not the least of which, of course, we think of especially during this season of thankfulness, is God's gift to us through his son. May you all eat your fill tomorrow with thankful hearts, drinking in the euphoric feeling of breaking bread with family and friends, who are, as you know, priceless. Happy Thanksgiving!

A New Generation is Born!

Yesterday I had the distinct privilege of getting to meet, in person, Atticus Hudson Wendling, my new and first grand nephew, born this past Thursday to my niece, Amy and her husband, Matt. Atticus is perfect - little fingers and toes, a little turned up nose, and oh yeah - a little "cleft" in his chin, just like my brother (his grandpa!). This is a picture of my youngest son, Tanner, holding Atticus for the first time. He was all wrapped up like a Guatemalan burrito, and seemed to care not as we passed him around, welcoming him to our world and loving on him. It's amazing to think of how God already has a plan for this young precious life. I know they grow up really fast, so put on your seatbelt, Atticus, and enjoy the ride!

Sleepover!

We had a sleepover at our house last night - 7 children aged 8 and under along with myself, Mal, and Coral, Mal's friend (and mother of 3 of the sleepees!) There were three 2 year olds, a 4 year old, a 5 year old, a 7 year old, and an 8 year old. Holy cow, do these kids have energy. And can they eat! They had spaghetti, garlic bread, pizza, cookies, ice cream, more cookies, etc., etc., etc. But they also had a good time (I think!) They played bean bags and cars, they watched movies and cartoons. There's just something about children - they don't worry about where the food comes from - they just eat it. They don't wonder about how the tv works - they just watch it. Who had the money to buy toys for us to play with? That thought never crosses their mind - they just play. Life is much simpler for them - blankets and pillows became forts and buckets on their heads made them robots. How fun. How easy. Hope I can keep some of that (or get some of it back) as I age.

Thankfulness

This week I have heard of so much sadness from so many of my patients. There are so many people who are hurting and in very hard circumstances. Hearing their stories reminds me, especially as we enter this Thanksgiving season, to be so very thankful for my life, my family, my work...all the blessings I enjoy every single day with a relatively small amount of effort. I visited Guatemala a little over a year ago and was exposed to a whole different way of living. I came home from that trip extremely thankful for alot of things I hadn't thought about before..hot water, running water, refrigeration, stoves...but, to be perfectly honest, hot water kept coming to the top of the list - it now means alot to me. May we each go into next week remembering just how wonderful this life can be for us - how blessed we are - and may we search diligently for opportunities to be of assistance to those who, right now, are not experiencing those blessings currently.

Baby Atticus

Here he is - Atticus Hudson Wendling - my first grand nephew. Isn't he darling? 7 lbs. 14 oz., 20" long. Proud parents, Amy and Matt Wendling, proud grandparents, Jim Gardner and Toby Gardner, Proud great grandmother, Nola Gardner. Everyone is doing fine and we're all happy Atticus is here. The circle of life begins anew.

Sneak Peek

Here's a sneak peek at some of the renovations for Studio 4:13 and Soothing Moments Massage. Please come join us for an open house on Saturday, December 5th from 1:00 - 4:00 in the afternoon. You'll be able to experience and see firsthand our new serene, spa like environment while enjoying snacks, door prizes, etc. Gift certificates and retail items will be available for your holiday gift giving needs. Any questions, just call me at 208-8960. Hope to see you there!

It's coming together!

Finally - it seems like it has taken forever and yet in reality it happened really quickly. The salon where I rent space for my business has been renovated - yay! I'm down to putting things on the wall and bringing back the "decorative" things I took home for while we painted, put down the new floor, etc. It's been a huge undertaking (and my part was minute, but it still seems like a big upheaval!) Big thanks to all those who helped along the way - I couldn't have finished my part without you. It's funny the things you just kind of take for granted - my treatment rooms are all moved around and these first few days I have been stumbling around like it's my first days of doing massage! The funniest part is that at the very end, when we're done with the massage, I now seem to forget to unwrap people's feet from the hot towels - go figure! Who can figure that one out? I've blamed so much on hormones - maybe something shifted there in my memory organization - would that surprise anyone? I doubt it. Anyway, it really does look great and you owe it to yourself to come take a peek - especially if you saw the place before the renovation. I hear we'll be hosting an open house on Saturday, December 5 - stay tuned for times. It's amazing to me how one change, such as new floors, can make a place look completely different - even look a different size. It makes me wonder....could one small adjustment in my behavior make me a completely different "looking" person? Hmmm.....

Moving at a high rate of speed

That's my life - flying by, so to speak. I can't believe Thanksgiving is less than two weeks away - and you know what that means! Getting our Christmas tree, decorating for Christmas, planning get togethers, cookie day, etc., etc., etc. Whew! And it will fly by even faster as this next few weeks unfold - I know it will. Besides the busyness of the season, as you know, the salon where my business is located has undergone a huge renovation - I am not finished with my part of that yet, which adds to the chaotic atmosphere, but I am hoping to get my rooms finished asap - that will alleviate some stress and pressure, too. Amid all the upcoming excitement, I'm setting my intention now to enjoy the holiday season with friends and family, to help out others where I can, and to not let the demands of this upcoming time stress me out. It will pass so quickly and another year will be history - I want to enjoy it as I experience it - not look back and wish I would have done differently.

Crabby

Here's a picture of my niece - it kind of captures how I'm feeling lately. Yep - that's me - just kinda crabby. It's rather unlike me, so I've not been liking it too well. Sometimes it's hard to separate out whether I'm being crabby or just that as things change, I have to change, and I have to set boundaries - that's not always well received by the persons I'm setting boundaries with or myself for that matter! Change is not easy the older I get - used to be I loved change - change the furniture around, change this, change that - now I'm more liking things to be the same; i.e. "who moved that?" or "what do you mean we're doing it that way now?" At any rate, all of this is just circumstantial and I really do believe in my heart that my state of "crabbiness" (albeit perhaps partially hormonal!) is also a state of my mind - I don't have to react crabbily to things (is that a word?). It's a matter of staying tuned into what I'm thinking and listening to what my own mouth is saying - "did I just say that outloud?" It takes some effort, but I do believe that we have a certain amount of control over these things and the best place to start in my mind is being thankful to God for all the blessings I do have. I can't necessarily control how I feel, but I CAN control how I act, and eventually my feelings will fall into place. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Southern Living

Well, we're home from the south. What a trip. Things didn't work out quite like I had planned due to some serious illness, but nonetheless everyone will be ok and we made it. My dad's family is from the south, and I always feel so at home, so safe with these people who are so kind, so helpful, so genuinely interested in what you have to say. They stop what they're doing and talk to you and make you feel like they really do want to know the answers to what they're asking you. They'll do anything they can to make your stay more enjoyable. These are people who hug and kiss when they leave each other - where one of the owners is also one of the cooks is also one of the cleaning ladies, etc. etc. The food was amazing, of course, and tons of it - we could never finish it all at any meal. You could order anything fried in the world .... squash, zucchini, scallops, dill pickles, alligator, ocra - you name it, they can fry it and make it taste good, too. Speech takes on a slower drawl, but that doesn't mean they don't know what they're talking about. In fact, a couple of times they laughed at us - like when Tracey asked them "how their water was" - they thought she was a hoot; or when we commented that a man buying lots of fireworks must be having a party and he looked at us like that was just the normal amount of fireworks he buys everyday - doesn't need a party! Or when they couldn't believe we'd actually never been to a Civil War foundry. Shocking, I know! Life just moves a little slower down there, but these people seem happy - oh, they're tired and they work hard, but they're happy. The lake was beautiful and the weather was gorgeous. And by the way, for those of you wondering, the whirlpool was an oversized bathtub with jets, and the BP across the street? Well let's just say don't expect to pay at the pump over there!

Road Trip!

Tomorrow, bright and early, my two friends and I are embarking upon what promises to be the trip of a lifetime. We are traveling by car, lots of hours, to Cedar Bluff, Alabama. Quite a story as to why we're heading there, but suffice it to say this is a short weekend of relaxation, so we needed to go somewhere where they move (and talk) a little slower. Our motel is on a lake, so we anticipate walking and enjoying nature, and just doing nothing. I have already been laughing and laughing, enjoying the phone conversations I have had with the staff there, so I'm sure we will have stories galore after this adventure. Next weeks' blogs will, I am confident, be full of stories of laughter, mishaps, and adventure...assuming we even find the place! Check it out online if you'd like at www.thelighthousemotel.com.

Painting

The painting is done! At least my part. And here's the wisdom this "freshman painter" (that's what my daughter in law calls me!) has learned. It's not as hard as it appears; not everyone paints the same; people with short arms and bellies that stick out should use a roller with a long handle; you should lock a door that you're standing behind painting; painting over a cobweb - not so good; it all looks totally differently when it dries; painting is a fun chore when done with others - there's laughing, story telling, and bonding of people together. There's quite a feeling of accomplishment to look around a room and see the total transformation. The next step for us is new flooring..that will be done by professionals, which doesn't include me. Then I'll have re-arranging, sewing of new curtains, etc. to do - that will be fun, also. Now on to a fun birthday party for a friend of our family tonight. Life never slows down, eh?

Teach an old dog?

Can you? Teach an old dog a new trick? Depends on who the old dog is, eh? Well, the old dog is me, and the new trick is painting. Somehow for my 50 years of life, I have successfully avoided the job of painting. My mom always painted alot - in fact she seems to enjoy it. But I have never learned. So tonight, with the help of my friends and family, we did some painting at my business. There is a sense of accomplishment and comradery as we gaze at the cleanly painted golden khaki walls. And, in spite of just a few mishaps (such as when 1 year old Lincoln stepped in the paint pan with his itty bitty Nike tennis shoes), we all did fine. Thanks to those who could come help me - your patience with my questions was well appreciated. Stay tuned for more on the final product at the spa!

The Rez Sisters

My friends Judy and Marilea (pictured here) took me to a play last night at Illinois Wesleyan. Marilea really does have eyes - they're just closed in this picture - ha! Anyway, the play was called The Rez Sisters and it was about the plight of the Native American Woman in today's America. Of course, Wesleyan doesn't sport a large native population, so the ladies in the play were not native, but we used our imaginations. As I thought about the point to the play, it occurred to me that all women have the same "plight" if you will - some seem to have more susceptibility to fall into patterns of poverty, abuse, etc., but overall we all could be faced with the same difficulties. I am extremely blessed to live in the midwest, having the freedom to run my own business and my own life (and my children's lives when they let me - just kidding!), but you understand my point - I live in a place and in such a way that I have opportunities that many native American women just don't have. The other thought I derived from the play was that even though these 7 women did some fighting and arguing, in the end they were all sisters of such - held together by a common bond of a need for survival. One of the most enjoyable parts for me was that the background for the play was all drums - the program explained that they were using African drums - just like the one Karen got for her birthday (yesterday's blog post) only 100 times larger - and boy, could those women play! They were amazing. Don't know - there's something about the beat of these drums...keeps coming to me over and over again from different sources...might be important in some way????