Ouch!

Hurt feelings...what do you do about them? Is it best to let the person know they hurt you? Or should you just quietly forgive them - kinda "to yourself", so no one ever knows about it? What is the best thing for you and the other person - can you still be friends (or family) when this happens? It just seems like it's human nature - for one reason or another we let each other down, we hurt each other's feelings. Perhaps it's even unintentional or we aren't aware we've done it. Perhaps we're self absorbed and oblivious to how the other person feels. But when your feelings are hurt, things are just yukky. I used to think that I could just "bide my time" and I would eventually be vindicated because in this fantasy the person who hurt me would someday need something that only I could do and I would have the distinct pleasure of saying "NO" or they would have to apologize to me before I would help them. However, as I've grown up and older, my experience has been that when given the opportunity I can't purposely be mean to anyone. And even if I was able to be mean to that person, I suspect that the wonderful feeling of vengeance I've imagined wouldn't be so wonderful after all. So, after all is said and done, I guess I'll just try to see things from the other person's view and try to understand their behavior. When I can, I'll let the other person know they've hurt me - but only when it isn't so "raw" and I won't say things out of my hurt. And I'll try to remember that even though I may not realize it, today I may have hurt someone else's feelings too.